"" Life A Bit Sweeter: Stop the Fighting! The Children have to come FIRST!!!

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Stop the Fighting! The Children have to come FIRST!!!

So.....there is a single article circulating that has orphan advocates up in arms right now because it claims that Ethiopia adoption cases heard by the court will be drastically cut by about 90% per day.  You could imagine, to an adopting mama, like me, who believes her daughter is waiting in Ethiopia, that is almost a drastic blow to my heart.  Although some of the statements in the article don't add up, it does accurately share the sentiment that the system is trying to figure out how to get rid of the corruption that exists.  Don't get me wrong, I am a HUGE advocate for making sure that every child that is placed in a family is a true orphan.  How painful for the child, birth parent, and adoptive parents to later find out that their child was a part of a sham or kidnapping.  At the same time, my heart hurts for the children who get caught in this bottleneck of adults not working together to come up with the BEST solution for the child.

I remember as a child, when my mom died, there was a lot of confusion about where to place my brother and me.  My parents who were married didn't have a will and my dad couldn't take care of us.  I think my mother never thought that at the age of 30 (when she died), that she'd need to make plans for who would take care of her children.  As it often happens in many families when a person dies, there was a lot of confusion because there was no plan.  My mom's family wanted us and so did my dad's family.  Both families were hurting because of my mom's sudden death and both families had the best intentions and deeply loved my brother and me.  So what was the result?  Cut us right down the middle --so to speak.  My brother went to live with one side of the family and I went to live with the other.  Talk about trauma!!!!  Within a very short period of time, my brother (age 10) and me (just about to turn 5), suddenly loss our mom, our father, the life we knew, and each other.  Again, EVERYBODY really meant well.....I believe that with my whole heart; yet, in the midst of their quarreling with one another, I think they forgot what was most important......What will be best for the children?  What will be best for Michelle and Michael?  WOW.  The lack of focusing on just that question alone did major psychological damage to my brother and I as not just children, but human beings.

I'll always believe that God's #1 plan for children is for them to be with their birth parents; however, because I know we live in a fallen world, that's not always possible.  If you noticed in my first paragraph, I said that this potential news about Ethiopian adoption is ALMOST a drastic blow to my heart.  The reason it's not hitting me so hard is because I know God's love for the orphan.  Because he loves the orphan so much, He'll make sure that these little ones (over 4 million of them in Ethiopia) won't be forgotten.  You know why I know that for sure?  Because He didn't forget about me.  Sure, the emotional part of my situation wasn't ideal but I was well provided for and spent significant time with both sides of my family.  God promises in Romans 8:28 that ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD.  My situation worked out for good because here I am today, still standing and now an orphan advocate.  Although we grew up in separate homes, my brother and I remain very close.

So...be encouraged orphan advocates.....this is God's battle.  He knows that the children have to come FIRST.  So let them talk but let us pray, stand firm in love, be obedient to the word, and work together.  Let Him use us as the vessels for people to see a miracle and His love.  In the words of another adopting mommy....."He's got this!"

10 comments:

Kristi J said...

so well said...Amen, kristi

Kim said...

I have been reading about this, and while we are not an adoptive family (yet), it definitely broke my heart for the children who may be left with NO ONE because of it.

Angi: Tim Cooper said...

Amen Sister! HE does have it under control...who better? HE is in charge of it all...Thanks for the enocuraging post! Angi & Tim Cooper

jkseevers said...

thanks, Michelle for putting into words what's been on my heart. Although I know the truth about God's love for the orphans, it's still great to be reminded when the enemy starts whispering his lies into my ears. God is Sovereign. He has a plan. A perfect plan. I'm resting in this!

I'm soo sorry to hear that your mom died at such a young age, and that you had to endure such heartache. I'm soo glad that God restored your heart and that you were able to remain close to your brother. Praise God!

Blessings and hugs!
K

LBWV said...

Amen, amen, amen. I linked to your post at: www.wafflesvspaghetti.blogspot.com

Two Cent Sparrow said...

Thank you for this wonderful post! Our family is in the paper-chase right now with AWAA trying to adopt two young children from Ethiopia. Your words spoke to my heart. We must press into Jesus and remember that He is Sovereign in all things.

Cami said...

Thank you for sharing your story. I too, remain hopeful the children will not be forgotten. We are in process to adopt our daughter's 4-year old birthsister and it is unbearable to think she will have to wait such a long time unless they get this figured out. Thanks again for your post...

Brandi said...

Well said!! Thank you!!

Candace and Joe said...

Thank you for this, Michelle! This is one of the first posts I have read after a break from blogging. I needed to read this! You are an encouragement!

Candace

LIfe A Bit Sweeter (Michelle) said...

Thanks so much for reading. I honestly read every single comment that is left on my blog and try to respond. It's so overwhelming sometimes to see the love that is left so thanks so much for the link-ups in your blog post(s) and for YOUR continued encouragement throughout this journey. Truly enjoy following you all as well!

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