"" Life A Bit Sweeter: Adoption Myth#1: I Won't Love Him/Her Like My Own Biological Children

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Adoption Myth#1: I Won't Love Him/Her Like My Own Biological Children

Based on my post from yesterday, I want to start talking about Adoption Myths.  Periodically, I'll share a myth and where the fear in that myth is grounded, then the truth of real life stories from families who are adopting/have adopted.  So let's take 'em one at a time and keep going.  So in no particular order.....

Myth #1:  I won't love him/her like my own biological children.

I totally get this.  I remember when I had our first son, "C", I honestly had a fear about would I/could I love another child as much as I love "C".  I mean I REALLY LOVED that boy so how in the world could I have even more love to share....but you know what I did and I can't explain how my heart was able to expand to give out more love....it just did.

While both of my boys in this example are my 'biological' children, I really believe something about the power of CHOOSING to love.  When we choose to love and I mean REALLY love, there is something powerful that happens in our heart because BIG LOVE and FEAR can in no way co-exist.  When you love someone in fear --whether its fear of rejection, disappointment, or whatever -- it's difficult to allow love to take you to a place that you can never imagine.

If you're married or have been in a relationship, think about your spouse.  They are NOT your blood.  You simply chose to take a RISK in loving that person and being vulnerable to that person.  How much do you love your spouse?  They're not your blood but you love him/her as you love yourself, right?  Why?  You CHOSE love. 

I love the story that Steven Curtis Chapman shares about his wife, Mary Beth, when she had doubts whether or not she could really love an adopted child the same way that she loves her biological children....and since that time, they've adopted multiple times.  Let's hear about it in Steven's words:

Let's talk about it.  What are you thinking?


Engendo said...

my response -> http://journey2ethiopia.blogspot.com/2010/07/adoption-myth-1-i-wouldnt-love-adopted.html

Debb said...

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS POST!!!!!!! I am in tears! SO precious!!

Michelle said...

Kim: Enjoyed seeing your response. Thanks so much for sharing on your blog.

Debb: Isn't it such a great testimony?!?!?

Engendo said...

Michelle - i dig reading yours every day and i think its a great idea to explore some of the adoption myths. and gosh i love scc

Michelle said...

Thanks so much Kim! Yep, I'm with you....love his music!

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