My Birth Mom's Birthday

Yesterday was the birthday of my birth mom, Karen or Kay as she was affectionately known. By my calculations, she would have been 62 yesterday.  She died 19 days before her 31st birthday.  I was just turning 5 the following month.  Life changed so quickly during those months and then the subsequent years for my brother and I as we split into separate homes.

I had such a GREAT time today as I sat with my Aunt Johnette and cousin John as they shared stories about how my mom used to sit on the couch, suck her thumb, and how much of a home body she was.  I ate every single one of those details up and always yearn to know more and more and more about her.  I yearn to know what her voice sounded like but people didn't record like they do now.  Instead, I inquire here and there with relatives to get more details. Photos of my mom are very rare and I only own one. She was totally not into the whole picture-taking thing....I'm beginning to think she was a total introvert....totally opposite of the little girl to whom she gave birth!  LOL.

As we move further into this adoption journey, I think more and more about Selah and her mom.  As she grows older, will she wonder about some of the same things that I do and have?  Will she yearn to know her birth mother more....her voice....her touch...her mannerisms?  I'm absolutely positive that the answer is yes.  I pray that God grants us the opportunity to meet her mother in order to learn as much as possible in our brief meeting. That meeting would be as priceless as the little girl she and I will share.

Every child needs a mother and a father for two distinct reasons.  I am so grateful that God loved me so much that He did not forget my deep need for a mother-figure/mother in my life. I remember my mom (Grace) who raised me as her child after my mom died, told me that she would never try to take the place of my mom. I am forever grateful for her articulating those words to me because my birth mother is not my past or a fading memory. She is very present in the pages of my life as I continue to grow and even sometimes reflect 'Kay' in pieces of me.